When Donald Trump chose J.D. Vance to be his running mate, I was frightened.  The only thing more scary than a madman making draconic and ferocious threats is having somebody by his side to carry those threats out.  What is it called when the devil makes a deal with the devil?

J.D. Vance made some very unkind, untrue, and ungracious remarks about women who don’t have children.  He called them cat ladies, purporting that their goal was to make everybody else miserable.  For those out there who don’t have children, I apologize on his behalf.  And, I apologize to ALL of you, unlike his wife, who said that he only meant it about those who actively made the choice not to procreate.  Truth be told, I could almost hear him and Trump hurling classless insults and appearance jabs at women who never married.  “Who would marry or tap into that?  Who would want to make a kid with that?”

I have 3 children, but they don’t speak to me.  Am I childless in J.D. Vance’s eyes?  What about the moms who face tragedy far worse than mine and have to bury children?  Are they childless in J.D. Vance’s eyes?  Is the mom who delivers a stillborn childless?  What about the woman who selflessly gives her baby up for adoption?  Is she childless?  What about the surrogate who so munificently agrees to carry a couple’s child because they can’t conceive on their own?  Oh, wait, that wouldn’t even be an option if Mr. Trump and Mr. Vance were elected.

My oldest, Marissa, went through hell and back with such advanced Ulcerative Colitis, eventually losing her colon.  All of the details are here – www.marissasurgery.wordpress.com. It was such a real and tangible possibility that having children for her would be nearly impossible, but, with the help of IVF, she is now a mom to two beautiful daughters.  I’ve never seen them, not even a picture, but I know that they’re beautiful.  I know that they’re beautiful because their mom is positively gorgeous.

Mr. Vance, just stop.  Stop with the toxic vitriol.  Stop with the name calling.  Stop with the unsupported speculations.  Whatever the reason for a woman not having children in her life, she is hurting.  And, it hurts enough without you augmenting, exacerbating, and compounding the pain.